Author Topic: The Breakup Test: 5 Questions to Ask Before Giving 'Em the Boot  (Read 1908 times)

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Offline davidenko

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The Breakup Test: 5 Questions to Ask Before Giving 'Em the Boot
« on: December 28, 2007, 07:34:35 PM »
[float=left][/float]Is it better to be the breaker-upper or the dumpee? With so much attention being paid to those poor people dumped every year, no one ever takes time to think about what it's like to be the dumper. Hardly an enviable position, the decision to break up with someone can breed feelings of guilt, paralysis and depression.
To alleviate some of this anxiety, here's a list of 5 questions to ask yourself before you give someone the boot.

Question 1: Has There Been a Major Change in My Life?

Relocation, career change, an illness -- any of these factors can trigger problems in a relationship.
Relocation, career change, an illness -- any of these factors can trigger problems in a relationship. If you're stressed out about something, be it a job or family problem, it's all too tempting to generalize these feelings to include your partner. It's very easy to think that if you got out of this relationship you would feel better. In reality, you need to deal with the problem rather than blame it on your partner.

Question 2: What's My Happiness Ratio?
Being blissfully in love with your partner 24/7 is a wonderful concept in theory, but as we all know, real-world relationships rarely live up to these expectations. Many people assume that they have to be 100 percent satisfied with their partners in order to stick with them, but good luck ever finding this perfect scenario!
A better strategy would be to adopt the 80 percent rule. Ask yourself:
Am I satisfied with my partner 80 percent of the time or more?
Am I satisfied with my partner 80 percent of the time or more? If the answer is yes, then you're working with pretty good odds. If the answer is no, you may want to consider moving on.

Question 3: Is He/She Abusive?
Abusive behavior comes in many forms. There's physical abuse where someone hits, slaps or shoves you. A verbally abusive partner degrades you with harsh words and insults. And the most difficult to identify and pinpoint: psychological abuse. This form of abuse can involve overly controlling behavior, emotional blackmail, and episodes of extreme jealousy. If your partner engages in any of the above behavior, don't just walk -- run from the relationship.

Question 4: Have I Expressed My Frustration?
Many of us think that if our partner was right for us, he/she would be able to understand our needs intuitively without us ever having to communicate. While it would be great if our partners could just read our minds, the truth is that few of us are telepathic.
Good communication is required in every relationship.
So before you give your partner their walking papers, make sure to discuss your doubts and concerns so they have a chance to make it up to you.
So before you give your partner their walking papers, make sure to discuss your doubts and concerns so they have a chance to make it up to you.

Question 5: Am I Willing to Work at It?
Whatever your gripes or complaints, there's one factor that can make or break your union: your mutual desire to work on the relationship. If you're not both committed to improving your quality of life together, there's very little hope for the future.
And remember, actions speak louder than words. If both of you make a concerted effort to work on the relationship and make the necessary changes that are required, there's really no reason to call it quits.


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Offline Dubai

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Re: The Breakup Test: 5 Questions to Ask Before Giving 'Em the Boot
« Reply #1 on: January 06, 2008, 11:26:09 PM »
thank you but what about us that dont have?
lead us well dont let this nation to fall inside well mr president

Offline Penthome

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Re: The Breakup Test: 5 Questions to Ask Before Giving 'Em the Boot
« Reply #2 on: January 11, 2008, 07:12:06 AM »
Words and opposite - break up or break down the choice is entirely yours.

Na only God know relationship wey go last.
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Offline ngslide

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Re: The Breakup Test: 5 Questions to Ask Before Giving 'Em the Boot
« Reply #3 on: January 29, 2008, 11:43:59 AM »
well those questions are the main thing before calling it quit in any relationship.
the two parties most come to an agreement to change incase of any change of attitude and if that looks like a big task then break up is the thing and if one is willing to absorb all the changes in behavior and with the hope things will work fine that is "patience" but who is willing to do that now for the sake of love abi na lust?

Offline tweet

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Re: The Breakup Test: 5 Questions to Ask Before Giving 'Em the Boot
« Reply #4 on: February 01, 2008, 04:14:08 PM »
@topic

Good topic.... Some pple break up their relationships without giving their patner a reason 4 doing so.

If you have to break up, give ur patner at least one reason why both of u will be better off apart, that way, the dumpee would understand better ;D. instead of breaking the poor fellow's heart.
GODISNOWHERE can be read as GOD IS NO WHERE or GOD IS NOW HERE. Think positive.

Offline freddiewit

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Re: The Breakup Test: 5 Questions to Ask Before Giving 'Em the Boot
« Reply #5 on: February 01, 2008, 04:39:18 PM »
Break-up ???; that's a tragedy. I want to hear the 'live happily ever after' kind of yarns.

Offline tweet

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Re: The Breakup Test: 5 Questions to Ask Before Giving 'Em the Boot
« Reply #6 on: February 01, 2008, 04:59:56 PM »
you need to go and read cinderella or snow white
GODISNOWHERE can be read as GOD IS NO WHERE or GOD IS NOW HERE. Think positive.

Offline freddiewit

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Re: The Breakup Test: 5 Questions to Ask Before Giving 'Em the Boot
« Reply #7 on: February 01, 2008, 05:06:07 PM »
Exactly. I just finished watching Enchanted: That's more like it.